Damn You, Facebook

I swore I would not get sucked in to the collection of people in order to validate myself, but Facebook just makes it too easy with its constant suggestions of “people you may know”. And what’s worse is no one I send a friend request to questions my right to “claim” them. Only one or two have ever even asked,

“And who the hell are you again?”

Oh okay, I have been rejected. Two guys I actually know ignored my friend request although one of them took my suggestion of possible friends for him and added her to his friend list. I would have thought he would have gotten over our high school antipathy for each other, but I see that his religious vocation hasn’t improved his disposition much. The other gentlemen was a college friend but since I can’t recall a single conversation I ever had with him where he wasn’t a) looking at himself in a mirror or b) checking around to see who might be watching him talking to a fat girl who didn’t complement his hip cheerleader image.*

“Are you friends with my sister now?” Rob asked me.



“Because Facebook suggested I might know her,” I replied.

“Yeah, I have a solution for those ‘suggestions’. I hit the x mark and delete them.”

And I do, but many of the people suggested are fellow bloggers and writers and I like networking. I just think the line blurs a bit with the constant suggesting. Then it becomes a game of sorts. I have one suggested “friend” who has over three thousand friends. The more popular bloggers have hundreds who are probably readers of theirs and that may be where my drive to reach out stems from. I am hoping to get people to read what I write on the sites I am writing for. There’s nothing wrong with that? Is there?

I have made good requests. I found my old friend Leslie. Do you remember her? I blogged about her not long ago. She is not the Internet slug I am, so I have just heard from her a few times, but she was a gem among the friends found recently.

I am in control of my Facebook destiny however. If I were not writing as prolifically as I am at the moment I would pull the plug on it. But writers need platforms – I am told – for reaching out and interacting. So I stay. 

*Yes, I know that male cheerleaders in college are so the opposite of cool. For the record, I was about the only girl in our circle of friends who didn’t have a crush on him. I don’t like pretty men.

7 thoughts on “Damn You, Facebook

  1. Facebook is driving me insane, because in the last few months I’ve had a slew of people from high school wanting to be my friend. We weren’t friends 20 years ago in high school, I haven’t seen you since, why would be friends now?

  2. I swore after high school that I would never get involved in another popularity Olympics again. I always got the tin medal.

    At least you got a medal, U.B.! I was always left picking up the popcorn and soda cups after the stands were empty.

  3. Interesting you chose FaceBook. I’ve heard that MySpace is the option of choice for writers. But what do I know? I don’t do social networking. At least not right now.

    And my wife doesn’t like pretty men either. That must explain why she ended up saddled with me.

    MySpace is not the platform of choice for Canadians and I originally used it to keep up on news with the older girls and Rob’s family. Many writers have a MySpace and a FaceBook plus they twitter and have a professional website that highlights their work. I am behind in the whole platform building thing.

  4. fell in love with a pretty man boy in high school… my best friend… gay… ouch… let’s just say i won’t rule out a gorgeous man, but any man who spends more time in front of a mirror than i do (and it doesn’t take much) is quickly relegated to the ‘discard’ stack…

    your facebook conundrum reminds me why i don’t want to jump into that realm… i’m too competitive not to want to collect people… ugh…

  5. I learned not to like pretty men in first grade when the most beautiful boy in the class was a stuck-up snob. Now I like them a little wrinkled around the edges.
    Somehow I got friended by someone that I don’t remember approving or even seeing the request for. But it’s OK, it’s not someone I dislike. Anyway, I forget to go to Facebook a lot of days. And I wish they would make it more like Ning where you can choose a theme. The New Facebook sucks.

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