remarriage of widowed people

The Wedding Photographers


Rob found Peggy and David on the internet. They are local to the Jasper area and their website has photo spreads of many happy couples tying the knot at the various locales around there. What pulled him, and then me, to this particular duo were the mountain backdrops they used. We are both quite partial to the mountains.

They arrived just ahead of the  M.C and  began assessing the area. During the ceremony they took candid shots and were quite unobtrusive. After the group shots were finished, Peggy asked us if we were okay with leaving the chalet for a bit, just the two of us, to take a few shots at a wonderful location just down the road but first there were a few spots on the grounds where she would like to pose us. So, off we went and I should have slipped on my hiking boots before we did. Marriage Alberta mountain style means climbing up and clambering down rocks and steep embankments for the perfect wedding photos.

Peggy had us laying on the ground and perched against trees. We slid down a sandy embankment only to find that we still had a bit of rock climbing to do to reach the perfect spot out by the river. Rob offered to carry me out but I didn’t want him to lose his footing too. When we were finished though, he scooped me up without asking and carried me back much to Peggy’s delight.

The most memorable moment of the on site photos occurred when Peggy began to lead us towards the backyard of the chalet’s owners. She was nearly always talking and half turned around facing us while she was and she was nearly into the yard when we all froze and began strategically retreating while giving each other looks that said, “Who would like to tell her?”

I think it was Chris who saw the gentleman first but it didn’t take any of us long to realize that the man sunning himself yards off in the yard was nude. The owners of the chalet are German and according to Rob in Germany people don’t have any problems with nude sunbathing. While he was there on business he said it was not unusual to see people strip down and catch some natural vitamin D in the buff in the parks in the city. Peggy was a bit puzzled when she realized we were walking away until she turned and saw why. Later she explained that she would have had us just continue on but she was certain she knew the guy and didn’t want there to be awkwardness the next time they ran into each other. 

After we returned to the wedding site, Rob and I left the chalet grounds and followed Peggy and David to a spot further down the river which afforded a much expanded view of the mountain range and the river itself. Rob had brought along a half finished bottle of Riesling from the night before and glasses for a bit of private toasting which Peggy decided to include in the pictures. Several times she had already commented that I had found “a keeper” and the wine just reconfirmed her opinion.

More than once Rob and I had to be asked “um, could you stop kissing for a bit?” Catching us at it again as we waited for David to light the shots, Peggy proclaimed, “You two are the kissingest couple of 2007.” While we sat and had a bit of wine, trying to “look natural”, Rob looked me in the eyes and told me, “You can be anything you want to be.” He has told me this before. His faith in my writing ability and my dream of writing for a living has been unwavering. At that moment his statement seemed as much a promise as the vows we had just taken. I know that no matter what he won’t let me get discouraged or quit on this dream of mine. It is such a gift to have the love and support of someone who believes in you. I am truly lucky.

On the drive back to the chalet, Rob selected one of our songs from the iPod to play. It was the Flies “Got You Where I Want You”. It is one of three songs that we consider ours. We toasted again with wine and beer this time and he cranked the volume as we both love loud music blaring as we drive or ride. The sun was shining. My sexy as hell husband was looking quite dashing in his tux and I was riding shotgun. And all was truly right with the world.

A Wedding Dinner and the Dead Dog


The wedding dinner was held at Becker’s. There is a gourmet restaurant  on site that is wonderful. Our party numbered just 15 and this included the three small children who were in attendance. The wait staff was very attentive and accommodating where the kids were concerned. The bartender even mixed up a carafe of chocolate milk just for them. Our server was from Quebec. She told my daughter she looked just like a princess and commented on how much alike we look. At one point during dinner she was chatting with Katy and then told me the story of her marriage when her daughter was three. Her daughter referred to the wedding as “our” wedding and still talked about the day when “we all got married”.

There was no pre-planned meal. We ordered off the menu. Carafes of the house red and white wine and cocktails kept the adult members of the party well hydrated. Because the chefs were in charge of the pacing of the meal it was leisurely but they were quite happy to make sure the children were fed first. Rob had a wild herb encrusted filet mignon. I joked that he would have to dance the cow off later when we went into the pub in Jasper, but he replied that he wasn’t planning to dance.

“I see how it is,” I told him, “put a ring on your finger and your feet stop moving.”

The best man howled at that one. The best man actually was quite the party favor. Surrounded by women from 22 to 76, he didn’t lack for attention and did his best to provide banter and giggles. At one point he kissed my mom’s older sister and taught my mother how to use a crystal wine glass to produce a rather ear drum piercing tone. Actually, by the time my mother got in on it, everyone at table was wetting fingers and rubbing glasses, and yes, there was innuendo to be had but the children had already been spirited away by the matron of honor’s mother to watch videos in their cabin at this point.

My mother proved to be quite the party girl. After the wine glass game ended (something I think the other patrons were grateful for), the best man decided to  teach her how to spoon. I think it was Rob’s older daughter, Farron, who started the spooning. First you need to wet the tip of your nose and then breathe heavily on the spoon. If optimal moisture conditions exist, the spoon will adhere to your nose. It took mom a bit to manage it but eventually the spoon stuck. 

Between my rather inebriated mother (“I am not drunk,” she proclaimed loudly and often enough to invoke the Gertrude rule), and our luxuriously eye lashed best man dinner was a success. Of course the delicious food and drink and excellent service played a part as well as the happiness of the day. 

Dinner began at 7PM and when we left at about 10:30 there was still plenty of light so a trip into town to the Astoria Hotel to visit its Dead Dog pub (on a tip from our extremely amiable French-Canadian server) was next on the celebratory agenda and so was hailing a cab service.

The Dead Dog is a local’s pub located on Connaught which is the main street in Jasper. There are pool tables, darts and dancing bartenders. Rob and I were treated to anything we liked on the house by the woman behind the bar but truthfully, I had no more than a sip or two of the white wine and I don’t think Rob finished his beer either. The best man offered us celebratory shots of something vanilla that necessitated lemon sucking immediately after and lucky wasn’t noxious enough to unsettle dinner. He was the only one of the wedding party to stay in costume prompting Rob to tell me the story of how the groomsmen and ring-bearer managed to completely destroy their tuxes after he and Shelley’s wedding. I didn’t remember it at the time, but one of Will’s groomsmen returned his tux completely covered with mud and vomit. I don’t think either story needs much explaining.

Cheryl thought that we should dance but we weren’t inclined to dance to anything other than our songs. We have three but Rob couldn’t find any of them on the juke box which was one of those video variety with the touch screens, prompting Rob to ask if he was old because he was looking about for one of those old Wurlitzer’s. It’s not old to want something classy in my opinion.

Jordan continued with the candid shots until her digital camera died but eventually the younger members of the party took to the pool tables and Rob and I snuggled and smooched and generally tried to stay awake. At some point nearing 1 AM, we decided to call the cab service, so while we waited Rob stuck a looney into the internet access computer that was there and I checked my email and surfed the news sites a bit before looking at the YWBB board. 

“We are pathetic,” I told him.

“Uh-huh,” he agreed readily and went to find the men’s washroom.

I wasn’t compelled to open any posts but Kirsta’s and was glad I did when it turned out to be her and Scott’s wedding announcement. As I was reading, Jordan wandered by and nodded at the computer.

“You know what this makes you?” she asked.

“A geek,” I replied.

She nodded, “Welcome to the family.”

The Wedding



“We are gathered here today to witness the formal joining of Rob and Ann in the legal state of matrimony.

You are to be married according to the orders, customs, and the authority granted by the government of the Province of Alberta.

Matrimony, as understood by us, is a state enriched by a long and honorable tradition of devotion. According to the law, each participant is equal and supports the common rights of one another to the marriage.

Marriage is not just a ceremony here today. It is a commitment for life. Therefore, it is not to be entered into thoughtlessly or irresponsibly. There must be a desire for lifelong companionship. Couples will support and comfort each other through the changing experiences of life.

May you laugh together in joy, grieve together in sorrow, and grow together in love.

Marriage means caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your marriage partner as about your own self-being. Marriage also means working together to create and sustain a home in which the marriage may flourish.

So, with this understanding, Rob and Ann wish to be joined in marriage.”

Those are the opening paragraphs of the civil marriage ceremony in Alberta province. My mother said afterwards that she has never heard anything so moving and as much as she hated to admit it, she found it more meaningful than the rites of Catholic Church. We all gathered round in a circle of sorts as the M.C., Beryl Cahill, led us through the ceremony. My mother said  she cried but I couldn’t tell you what anyone was doing or how they were reacting because my eyes were on Rob. Beryl had us face each other and join hands for most of the ceremony and we repeated after her. No nervousness. I only transposed words once and Rob not at all. No tears either. Just looking into each other’s eyes and smiles. At the conclusion we kissed quite passionately and Beryl made the comment that “if someone can pry those two apart. We can get the paperwork signed.” After we completed the signing, she brought us back to the circle and introduced us as Mr. and Mrs. to our family and friends.

It was gorgeous out at a bit before 5 PM on June 26th in Jasper. Windy but warm in the sunshine. One of the photographers, Peggy, told us a bit later that the weather was actually much better than a typical June for the area.

The most important thing about all those moments was that we, Rob and I, were together.