There is a couple in B.C. who want to use a procedure called pre-implantation genetic diagnosis as part of an IVF attempt to produce a sibling match for their eight year old son in need of a bone marrow transplant. The procedure itself is more commonly used by couples who carry genetic markers for a variety of genetic illnesses. Many of which are fatal. The hospital in B.C. turned the couple down for IVF citing ethical concerns, but they also added that the mother, at 47, was far too old to produce viable eggs for the procedure anyway.
Having been through two cycles of IVF myself at age 37, I know that once a woman hits her mid-forties most reputable IVF clinics will not do IVF unless the couple consents to using donor eggs. All those mid – 40’s and older movie stars who turn up PG without copping to IVF via donor egg are not doing the general public a favor by perpetuating the myth that women at mid-life can easily achieve pregnancy. The women who do get pregnant – “naturally” or through IVF with their own eggs – are freaks of nature, so to speak, because we really weren’t meant to do this. We are designed to wind down and stop producing viable eggs and therefore ceasing to be able to have babies. Not fair? Sure. Men can still impregnate after all, but don’t think that they are still sending their best guys into action. The older the father is the more likely there are to be genetic problems with any embryos created. Older men tend to father children with much younger women whose eggs are still primo. It’s not him. It’s her.
I can’t imagine the pain of this poor couple, but I wonder at the clinic that is essentially bilking them of $30,000.
anniegirl1138 
complex subject – with great observations and commentary! medical advancements have provided options that push our expectations ever higher. but at what costs – both financial and emotional?
the best we can hope for is ‘full disclosure’ of risks, and that individuals can make the most rational decisions based on their own circumstances – and accept all consequences that result.
education – such as awareness of the fertility issues you mentioned, as well as open discussion on benefits of donor eggs – would certainly help…
but if i were one of those parents? i can’t project what i might attempt to do to save my child… there are some areas where it’s really tough to be rational!
DE is stigmatized. Partly, I think, because we place such an unrealistic value on biological ties. As someone who was adopted, I don’t have the same view of it’s importance. It was at my late husband’s insistence that we did IVF at all because I was more than ready to adopt. His family had issues with adoption.
I understand the resistance to donor – egg or sperm – and I agree that OBs and RE’s and the Feminist movement in general needs to be more honest with women about their odds of conception once they hit their thirties. Though I know that many women, like me, ended up coming to the mom thing late simply because I didn’t met the right guy until I was already mid-30’s and you can’t do much about that.
Thanks for commenting.
I hear where you are coming from and understand 500% what you are talking about. However, disclosure is a very sensitive subject and the jury’s out in regards to whether it’s your right, my right, or anyone else’s right who chooses 3rd-party reproduction (donor egg) to grow their families.
In a perfect world all of the celebrities, public figures, and what not would come clean and be truthful and honest about the origins of their children. But that’s not the reality. Lots of people who aren’t public figures or celebs don’t disclose to the public their childrens origins because really at the end of the day its none one’s business.
The even bigger problem is that DE is still looked at as a dirty rotten secret which is shouldn’t be. It should be embraced, and loved for what it is. An alternative way to create or add to your family.
Where the message needs to be strong is from our doctors, OB’s and RE’s. They need to be educating the public that at the age of 32 our fertility takes a sharp decline, FSH levels rise, and egg quality deminishes.
And finally there are couples who no matter what will NOT give up using their own eggs, even when their clinics say you will not conceive with your own genetic material — and those couples continue to pour thousands and thousand and thousands of dollars in these clinics and the clinics continue to treat these kinds of patients.