why memes are evil and time-wasting


I was tagged by Unbearable Banishment who was tagged by Leah, who was tagged by Scarlet. The mission – to answer the 10 questions written by UB. In turn, I am to write 10 questions of my own and tag six people. As my per usual, I consider tagging optional and invite those who care to do so to play along in the comment box here or take it to their home turf and tag back.

1. George Bush. Lindsay Lohan. Dick Cheney. You have to sleep with one, marry one and kill one.

Ugh, this is just an awful question. I simply can’t kill anyone for being un-evolved. And it’s very un-yoga. I wouldn’t want to sleep with any of them but I have Rob, so there isn’t a need for me to even ponder the idea. And, of course, Rob relieves me of the whole “marrying anyone” thing.

Seriously, Bush is probably just banal evil whereas Cheney is pure evil by choice and poor Lindsay was raised  Beverly Hillbilly style and never stood a chance.

2. Would you prefer a comfortable relationship that was passionless or a torrid affair that’s riddled with angst and uncertainty?

I am certain that neither of those things is even possible for me at this point in my life though I did the latter as a younger, much dumber, woman. Minus the “torrid” because .. well … I just didn’t know any better or know myself well enough to insist on what I deserved.

3. What is your drink of choice?

Alcoholic? Because I can’t drink these days between sulphites and my pesky tendency to migraines. When just a few sips makes you ill, really, what’s the point? Not that there was a point back in the day, but it was easier when the nasty side-effects were a night’s sleep away.

I drink tea. I prefer it hot and sweetened. Chai if it’s available but I’ll make do with whatever is on hand.


4. Would you rather work an interesting job that was low-paying and be under constant financial duress, or have a comfortable lifestyle with a job that wasn’t very satisfying (but not a nightmare)?

I think I’ve done both – and with the same job – but at different points in my career. When I first started teaching, I made $18, 200 a year. It was an awesome job back in the days before standardized testing, NCLB and Race to the Top. I had autonomy and could make it as interesting and fun as I pleased. The last five years of my teaching career I was finally making money enough to be comfortable – not rich – but I didn’t worry much (dying husband and medical crap aside). But gawd, it was boring. Hemmed in by all sorts of idiotic rules and oversight. I tried to make it as fun as I could, but the wiggle room was less and less every year.

Money is awesome. There’s no substitute for the ease and freedom associated with having money in the bank and bills that are paid, but a boring job really has to be weighed heavily before you commit to that route.


5. You are boarding a plane tomorrow morning. Where are you going?

In no scenario I can think of  – short of someone dying or being near death – would I be getting on a plane. Have you forgotten who I am? I loathe air travel. Even for fun. Even if someone else was footing the bill.

But, if I could take off tomorrow for somewhere?

I have no friggin’ idea. Really. None. I don’t really think much about traveling too far away. Ask Rob. He’ll say,

“Where do you want to go for summer holiday?”

“Oh,” I’ll reply, “I don’t know. Where do you want to go?”

Travel is good. Staying home is a tiny bit better.


6. What was the last piece of music you purchased?

People still buy music? I get music from Rob and he … um … is Canadian. ‘Nuff said. But I did get an iTunes card last year and downloaded a bunch of pop rock and bad country stuff. There was Nickelback and Ludacris in the mix – I think – and quit judging me because I don’t care what the “hip” factor is on my music. That’s just too high school and faux cool to the point of actively being a poser.


7. If a book isn’t working for you, do you hang on hoping for redemption or bail out?

I ‘m done. No question. Life is full of great writing and I don’t waste my time or limited brain capacity on less than ideal prose.


8. Is it easy for you to admit when you’re wrong? Let’s be honest here.

Out loud? Kidding. I will eventually. First, I have to realize that I’m wrong. That’s what takes time.


9. Do you think fame is a useful tool or more trouble than it’s worth? If it came knocking on your door, would you open it?

Fame is useful but using it in a useful manner can be troublesome. If if came knocking, I’d make use of it.

10. Fill in the blank. I wish my parents had not __________.

I’m not going to second guess them. Mostly because I can only view their lives – that part which I was around for – from the perspective of a child and that is not very sharp hindsight, imo.

My questions now:

1. If your life was a romantic comedy, where would it be set?

2. Standing up or lying down? Context – subjective.

3. Which Star Trek era would you live in – provided that Star Trek was real and time travel was real and … you know … it was a geeky thing to contemplate even in the abstraction of a meme? Prequel? Original? or Next Generation?

4. Shower or bath?

5. Current event that most affects your actual life?

6. Celebrity crush? (celebrity being relative)

7. Do you read the novel or wait for the film version?

8. Bottled water or tap?

9. How prepared are you for the next Armageddon (keeping in mind that “the end of the world” is also relative and subjective in our modern times)?

10. If you could claim citizenship anywhere on the planet, where would it be and why?


I found this via Lora who discovered it at Kelly’s, who got it from someone else – that’s why it’s a meme. It’s alphabetical and arbitrary. I like it.

a. area code – 780(CAN) and like many folks these days, we have to dial it to access anyone local. Previously I was 515 (US) and before that 319(US). Those three prefixes have seen me through 13 residences and in five different zip codes. AND I have never been afraid to reveal any of my digits on a census form.

b. bed size – king, otherwise Rob would melt. I have reached the blast furnace stage of womanhood. I haven’t known personal body temps like this since I was pregnant. King is good. There is a great line about king-sized beds in one of Everclear’s maudlin “love” songs, Thrift Store Chair,

Yeah I wish we had never bought a king size bed
Yeah only damn thing that it’s ever been good for
Plenty room for the real good sex

c. chore you hate – I don’t like dance nights. Or anything much to do with dance. But it’s not a chore as much as it is one of those parenting “things” we all get ourselves into when we believe that children can’t be rounded properly without enrolling them in things. The worst thing about dance nights is sitting on the ground and listening to other moms out-mom me. Not hard to do if enthusiasm about kid’s hobbies and fascination with every detail of your kid’s life are criteria.

d. dog – no, but we have a “grand”-dog. His name is Loki. We’ve even babysat  him when his mother was away. Rob recoils from the whole thing. I buy Loki Christmas gifts and he rolls his eyes, but Loki knows it’s Christmas and that we are exchanging gifts and it would hurt his feelings to be excluded.

We have about five grand-cats and a grand-bunny. They do not get gifts. One of the grand-cats lives with us because his mother couldn’t take him along when she moved to the city. This cat lives in the garage. He is fed and watered and when no one has seen him for a few days, Rob does a sweep of the various nooks and crannies – but nothing that involves getting down on hands or knees … or even bending too deeply at the waist.

e. essential start of the day item – a cup of tea, it varies as to type. Right now, chai, but cranberry is one of my rotating favorites as is black tea. During asthma/allergy assaults, I drink a mixed blend that is soothing and clearing. I have special tea cups and Rob will ask me if he can use one if there are no other cups washed. Not that I get weird about people using my tea cups. I am fine. But, there are certain ones that I will drink from and I don’t touch the others. Two of them came with me from Iowa. Okay, that’s probably weird, but not in a screaming diva way.

f. favorite color – Grey. Grey is my favorite colour. Just like the song.

g. gold or silver – huh? I wear a wedding band and engagement ring. I also wear a double-heart with a diamond that Rob gave me the first time we met in person. I guess everything is mostly gold. I’ve never really noticed. I like them. They are pretty and Rob gave them to me.

h. height – 5′ 9″ish little more “ish” than just “9”. I am not tall enough to wear tall pants but too tall for what passes for the average inseam (between 30″ and 32″)

i. instrument(s) that you play – I was given piano lessons for about six years as a child but they didn’t really take. I played the bass clarinet in high school, mostly by ear. I would not call myself musical at all though I really like to sing. I sing alone in the truck with the radio blasting to drown me out.

j. job – I blog for the education channel at Care2. I would like to get the assistant book club editor thingy at SVM, but I sent an inquiry and haven’t heard anything, so I am not hopeful. It’s a paid thing, but more importantly, it is a chance to learn more. It would be fun to be an editor for a blog.

I am studying to become a yoga teacher. Someday I’d like to have a studio.

k. kids – yeah, I have some. They are all girls and they surprise and delight mostly.

l. living arrangements – We live in an old house that was moved to the country from the former prison site in town. It has history and ghosts.

m. mom’s name – Ruth. My dad’s friends called him Boaz, who was the husband of Ruth in the bible. Ruth has her own biblical book. She was a widow who eventually remarried though she was uncertain about leaving her late husband’s people behind to go off to live with the people of Boaz. Her MIL was the one who urged her to remarry. I always liked Ruth’s story. I first read it in a biblical coloring book I had when I was about eight or nine. I showed it to my dad who shared it with his friends. They loved to tease my mother that Dad had bought her for a shoe (Boaz had to give Ruth’s in-laws his sandal to show his good faith or something like that). Mom’s email address refers to her as “Mrs. Boaz”.

n. nickname – I have had so many, but none that really stuck beyond the person who gave it to me. I am not the type of person who earns nicknames or is adorned with endearments

o. overnight hospital stay – I stayed over a couple of nights when Dee was born and then again when she was nearly ten months old and I woke up early in the morning to discover her not breathing. She was sleeping with us. She pretty much slept with us from day one. The doctor wasn’t overly alarmed but wanted to monitor her overnight which had to be done in-patient.

The whole experience can probably be officially counted as the day I knew that Will was really ill. He wouldn’t break down completely for another two months, but the incident with Dee (which turned out to be something they called “breath-holding” which is not unusual they told me) stressed him to the point where he actually got lost driving to the hospital to meet us and then again when he went to the hospital cafeteria to get us something to eat. Stressful situations, I found out later, sent his adrenals into overdrive and they were already failing. It also aggravated the worsening situation with his white blood cells that were stripping his brain and dorsal nerve endings of their protective coating.

The night was horrible. A thunderstorm rolled in and triggered a migraine and I didn’t have anything in my purse to take and no way to slip off to get something because Dee was hysterical with fear. They had her hooked up to monitors and she barely let go of me. I thought about calling Will but it was pouring ass rain and he’d gotten lost twice already that day. I didn’t need the added worry and I was too focused on Dee to let myself speculate about Will. Speculation that was increasingly dark and unpleasant in outcome.

The next night I spent in a “hospital” setting was in hospice the night before Will died.

p. pet peeve – people who make assumptions about me that are really just projections of their own issues, which, I suppose, is what people do all the time pretty much without thinking.

q. quote from a movie

r. righty/lefty – righty though there are certain actions that my left hand seems to think are hers.

s. siblings – I have three and I have written about them quite a bit more than they would probably be comfortable with.

t. time you wake up – the alarm is currently set for 6:25 and on a good day, I don’t hit the snooze.

u. underwear – no, just no.

v. vegetables you dislike – I am not fond of the stalk part of asparagus just the part that looks like a pine tree. I don’t like reheated califlower. I am not fond of raw beets but cooked or juiced is okay. I don’t like cooked spinach, the texture alone is worlds of not right.

w. ways or reasons you are late – I was never late before I had a child. Rob runs a good half-hour late and therefore, so do I, but that is just when we are together. For some reasons that defies logic, when we set dates to meet each other – say for lunch – we are both on time (okay, I am early and he is on time). I hate being late, by the way. Being early is my most comfortable time-frame.

x. x-rays – the usual: teeth, suspected broken bones in wrist, foot and ankle with the first two confirmed. Upper GI’s and then the whole sonogram things for reasons that I am sure the gentlemen who are reading would rather I gloss over. I’ve never had an MRI or CAT scan. I was threatened once with something that would have required my swallowing something that sounded like it was simply nuclear waste – I declined, insisting that enough testing had been done and it was time for them to make like doctors and declare themselves yea or nay on the state of my gallbladder. I avoid doctors these days whenever possible.

y. yummy food you make – I make great desserts. From scratch. Scones of all flavors. Vegan cake – white, chocolate and spice. Oil-free cookies and breads: carrot, banana, and zucchini. According to Dee, everything I make is yummy.

z. zoo animals you like – I hate zoos. They smell. They are magnets for people who walk slowly and always three or four abreast. And the whole thing seems barbaric. I am glad I can’t talk to animals because I am sure that what they are saying as people stare at them includes the grizzliest of death threats.


While meme-ing around I discovered this wordpress post on the evil that is meme. The post’s author decries memes for among other things:

“…wasting valuable internet bandwidth that could be used for furthering the arts.”

I can’t argue with that personally. The time I put into creating these weekly memes could be spent writing the great Canadian novel which will sell like hotcakes, attract Hollywood film offers and finally allow me to keep my ever patient and loving husband in the lap of leisurely luxury he completely deserves.

So what about you, gentle reader? What feats would you attempt? What cures would you discover? Who would you be doing, if you weren’t a pathetic meme addict? 🙂

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