I didn’t take the easy road to motherhood. The one we all learn about in health class during junior high. Insert part A into part B then wait nine (ten really) months and baby will emerge (not exactly but I decline to be one of those moms who holds that ordeal over her child’s head). Consequently my feelings on the subject and the holiday in its honor are decidedly mixed.
Until today I have never really celebrated Mother’s Day in a greeting card family sitcom kind of way. Circumstances have been such that it wasn’t a priority or even a big deal. My daughter would cart home the obligatory art projects and frankly that was enough. Last year was the first year a “dad’s” input on the matter even came up. Rob was away on a golf holiday in B.C. with some buddies and apologized profusely for not being there to “help” and by that I took it to mean – take the child out shopping – but it really didn’t matter that much to me. I like the cards and strange gifts that her teachers dream up for her to put together and give to me. She is always so excited and loves to keep the gift a secret until I see it. This year her class is having a Mother’s Day Tea complete with musical numbers and treats on the Monday following and she is beside herself with glee. What more could a mum need?
Saturday Rob took Katy shopping for Mother’s Day. He asked me for ideas and I gave him a few. He then asked if my list (a very short one by the way) was an “either/or” or an “all of the above”. At which point I reminded him that Mother’s Day is a made up holiday that has too many consumer origins to make it as important as a birthday or a wedding anniversary or remembering loved ones who have died. Priorities. But I ended up with a pink Timex sportswatch. Waterproof with cool timing features. I also scored two yoga tops from my favorite store, Lululemon. I didn’t need any of those things. Well, the watch because time is starting to be an issue. I never get anywhere anymore unless I am late or just squeaking in at the last minute. Rob explained that the gifts were catching me up for Mother’s Days past. He is sweet like that, don’t ya think?
At one point in the not so distant past, I wondered if I would ever be a mom at all. There were days that followed when I worried that I wasn’t worthy and was certain that I was ruining my child with my ineptitude and failings. With almost six years of this mothering thing under my belt, I am pretty sure I am not the worst mother on the planet in any era nor am I a candidate for mother of the year. Like most women I fall somewhere in the middle and consider myself in very good company.