Childhood

The Okanagan Valley


It’s beautiful in the valley like something out of a Hollywood drama about the new rich and the wannabes who hanker after their wives and daughters, but it is stuffed like a California roll with people in search of a good life that doesn’t exist anymore and never really existed for most anyway.

To clarify, this has not been a vacation. Anything with family attached to it is not restful and is fun in only the most abstract of ways. There is always too much to do, and too many errands or odd jobs to take care of.  Elderly parents in particular are needy. There are things they cannot, or simply don’t do, on their own. They wait for opportunities like “vacations” to catch up on these things. For the past two years, all our trips have entailed duty. Our obligations as adult children took precedence over anything that we might have wanted to really do. We did manage to sneak in a couple of getaways, but they always felt rushed … because they were.

I have stated repeatedly that post this trip there will be a year long moratorium on vacations that include “family obligations”. We are going to rest and the family be damned. Anyone with the temerity to get sick, die or in any way need us does so at his or her peril.

We finally got a decent span of sleep Sunday night. It was not enough to right either of us, but I no longer feel like falling down. I am just a little light-headed and feel a tiny bit detached. Actually, I should say that I got a good night’s sleep. Rob was awake on and off waiting for a phone call or a text from ED, telling him that she and her sister had gotten back to Edmonton.

Despite reminding both the girls that he worried and wanted to hear from them that evening, neither of them called.

“They probably decided to stay over with Cee and Why (the newly married couple),” I said, trying to be reassuring.

It certainly made sense to me. Neither had gotten to bed much before 6AM Sunday and when we saw them before heading out, they were loopy from lack of sleep.

Around noon Rob broke down and called Cee, who was surprised to find out that Rob hadn’t known the girls had made plans to stay on a couple of extra days. Rob made his disappointment known to MK who passed it along to her older sister, who in turn sent a Facebook message trying to convince Rob that he had indeed been told about their plans. If he was then it was when I wasn’t around because I don’t recall that at all and I am the one who would have remembered it anyway.

I was always one to call my mom and let her know if I’d arrived safely. I still do that. My siblings never have and still don’t. People will scoff, but I think it’s a simple thing that requires nothing by way of effort, so I do it. That is just me.

The weather hasn’t been nice. Sunshine’s sporadic and it’s still quite chilly. We didn’t get outside much and Monday was eaten up with little things needing care and a futile trip to Apex Mountain only to discover the resort had closed for the season just the day before.

A highlight was our first sushi experience at a little place downtown. Rob was the only one who’d had sushi before and he walked us through the menu. The restaurant was just about empty as the ski season is over and the summer season hasn’t begun. Even BabyD managed to eat a bit of salmon which she liked more than the tuna. Mostly though she worked up an appetite trying to work out the chopsticks.

Our homeward journey begins tomorrow. Perhaps it will afford me a few more “vacation” like moments similar to the one of strolling Revelstoke in the hazy early morning or when Rob helped me work out the kink in my Night Dogs novel (I can finish it now) and helped me come up with the draft outline for a new idea (another novel with an “end of the world as we know it” feel and a strong female lead character). I can dream, can’t I?

The Thing That Can Do Everything – Updated


My daughter has this toy. Actually it is what remains of a toy. In its day, it was her most prized possession. Brimstone rained from the sky and the earth shook when it was misplaced, and so I made sure that didn’t happen too often on my watch. She called it “the thing that can do everything”. Read Full Article

Playing in Sand


My father built me a sandbox when I was about three years old. It was deep and wide enough that I could sit right in it and still have room for the Tonka dump truck and a small collection of buckets and little metal cars.

I would dig and build for hours, constructing roads along the mountains and in the valleys of the lands my imagination and willingness to get dirty produced.

When Katy developed her inevitable affection for sand, digging and piling, I decided to get her a sandbox. I had wanted her to have one that was at least big enough to get in. However, I had only a small trunk to haul it and the only thing I could fit was one of those little turtle boxes that you see at Target or Toys R Us. The downside of being the only parent and a financially strapped one at that – no SUV.

I gave the turtle box away last summer before we moved. Katy had out-grown it physically and I thought we could just get her a new one once we were in our new home.

Last summer though we contented ourselves with the sand at the park.

This summer with renovations progressing at a fairly impressive rate (my opinion only – my husband is less pleased), the idea of a sandbox in the back yard came up again. I suggested buying one. With the truck, I reasoned, it would be easier to get one that was much bigger than the old turtle.

Rob was having none of that. He would build a sandbox.

Great, I thought. BabyDaughter would have a sandbox like the one I remembered and loved so much. Who doesn’t want her child to have the same wonderful memories of childhood?

The box is pink. Not as large as mine was but my dad was building a sandbox with three children (eventually four) in mind and Rob had just BabyDaughter in mind. With typical Virgo forethought and precision, he first selected and prepared the area where the box would rest. This meant clearing out hedges, transplanting bushes and when this was done it lead to the expansion of the garden.

The box was built quickly but in order to satisfy Rob’s need for long life, it required several coats of primer and then paint. He also wanted the lid the be tight and secure which meant hinges and latches. And of course, everything had to be level.

I think he began work on the sandbox at the beginning of June and finished just after we returned from holiday after July 4th. MidKid helped, as she has been doing with much of the yard reworking and siding project.

Towards the end of last week, I was given the task of final leveling and with MidKid’s help placed the box on its foundations.

We’d underestimated the amount of sand needed, but BabyDaughter was thrilled. We’d purchased a few accessories when we had the chance to visit Target in the U.S. (they simply have nothing up here that even compares with this type of retail) and with bucket, dump truck and bulldozer, she and MidKid christened the sandbox.

MidKid and BabyDaughter in the pink sandbox their Daddy built.

MidKid and BabyDaughter in the pink sandbox their Daddy built.

I wanted to sit and play myself, but I need to cut my nails first. I am so not okay with sand under the nails anymore.