It took four days to get here. Home. The inside of the house looks like one of those Oprah in need of intervention homes. Totes, boxes, furniture in need of assembly if only there was room enough for another piece of furniture, and somewhere in the chaos is my daughter, Rob , myself and Rob’s daughter, Jordan. There is a a transient feel to each room, and yet there is more permanence here than I have felt in any house, including the one I just left, then I have felt in years.

Rob needed to get to work early this morning, so I got up and joined him for breakfast. I could have slept in. He wanted me to because I haven’t gotten much rest in the last several weeks, but it was my first “normal” day with Rob and I didn’t want to miss even a second of it. Toast and tea. Who would have ever believed what a banquet that could be?

There is a re-coupled widower on WidowNet whose signature includes the names of both his late wife and his current wife. After his late wife’s name he has the date of her birth and her death listed but after his current wife’s name it lists her birth date and then where a date of death would be it says…..”better be a damn long time”. Rob cites that sometimes when he talks about the future which I find so interesting because he and Shelley were together for 27 years which is almost five times as long as Will and I were together, and still, it wasn’t long enough. Is there ever enough time to spend with the person you have chosen to love and cherish above all others? I don’t think so. Four days in a truck. Tea and Toast at 7AM. Moving and removing furniture. Talking about the girls. Making wedding plans and planning dinner. You need a damn long time for these things. Damn long.